Part 1:

It didn’t seem to make much sense
To cross the field and jump the fence
Of hopeless, lifeless, drudgery
Without one last activity.

That’s what they said, and quite a lot.
They all together claimed I ought
To go to one last final prom
Just join the fun, and play along.

No not a chance, I told each one.
I’ve been to prom and had no fun.
And this year I will not attend.
There is too much I must amend

For students in my school are not
The kindest kind of mentioned lot
They hate me guys, so now you know
The reason that I cannot go.

A certain friend by name of Jess
Protested my uncanny quest
To stay away from prom that night
But we’re good friends, and didn’t fight

She merely wanted me to know
That were it her she’d surely go
She’d do it too, that is to say
If she’d not lived so far away

Three thousand miles and last best guess
And still protests my freakish quest
On continents so far away
“Just go to prom!” She’d often say.

But no, I told her I could not.
I would not even grant the thought
That showing up that fateful night
Would generate any delight

Poor Jess though still so far from me
I’d take her if I could you see
Which may not be, I could soon
Exactly what she had in mind.

Where she lives there are no such things
As proms and other sufferings.
She doesn’t get to turn it down!
And thus resulting in a frown.

Although Australia's quite a place
They haven't developed the taste
That yet creates that kind of dance
Around which adolescents prance

A good thing to, Jess- I informed.
There are things that can't be ignored.
The nature of a prom these days
is all about between the legs.

Its sad I know but its the truth
And dancing normal is no use.
These modern moves and pouding beats
The rythms that direct their feet

Just rubbing, rubbing up and down
They'll even take it to the ground
And continue the action there.
Although, it doesn't matter where.

Unlike most students that I know
I don't want to mate through my clothes.
While dancing to a quaking step
With some girl that I've just now met.

Perhaps abnormal, for a guy
But I'm not quite the common kind.
Thus I declare in poetry.
Those things just don't appeal to me.

Without a reason to attend,
Without obligation to send
myself into a world unknown-
I sat contentedly, at home.

Sort of...

Its 9pm and long past dark.
Still sitting here a world apart
From everyone I ever knew.
Alone a home, nothing to do.

Four hours ago I'd been elsewhere
Helping a friend of mine prepare
For his prom at another school
Heck, if he wants to go that's cool.

Amazingly, what a surprise,
Four hours later my poor eyes
were drooping at a rapid rate
With no way here to recreate.

I shrug my shoulders, grab the phone
So I don't want to be alone-
Big deal, I'll just dial up my friend...
Oh, his cell phone's off again.

No matter, I can drive you know.
I just stop by and say hello.
The boy is at his prom tonight
To him I'd be a welcome sight.

I'm wearing nice clothes at a glance.
A sky blue shirt and khaki pants
So technically I look alright
For going to a prom that night

I parked a bit across the street
And the hotel at which they'd meet
When prom was over- at midnight
Across the street and then: Sleep tight!
Tsk tsk, at highschool prom? Yeah right!

I jogged a bit across the way
Intent on only a short stay.
Just to pop in and say hello.
A word or two and then I'd go.

The problem though with walking in
to proms for schools I don't attend
is it takes tickets to be there
And I had not yet paid my fare.
But still somehow, I didn't care

I snuck around the entryway
with stealth unrivaled to this day
And four policemen guard the door
That would lead to the prom dance floor

Inside the door there's clearly labeled
The prom's official ticket table
"Hey I'll get that door for you."
"Well thank you sir, how do you do?"

I pulled the door, was thanked again,
And followed the two students in
I guess now in truth I can say
Chivalry still goes a long way.

I let the door click shut behind me
The ticket table loomed unkindly
I formed a smile and merely walked.
The ticket-takers merely gawked.

I passed as if nothing was wrong
And sure enough, before too long
they shrugged their shoulders uselessly
And not one of them bothered me.

Just three steps later, there I was
And feeling kind of lost because
There was no orgy present there
In fact, no orgy anywhere!

Which pleased me greatly all too soon
Turns out I'm just in the wrong room.
I found the orgy soon enough
I never have enjoyed this stuff.

I'm looking quickly for my friend-
I haven't much time to expend.
A fifteen-minute stay I planned.
Because the prom is out of hand.

After a while, my friend walked in.
He saw my face and frowned and then
I smiled, though again all too soon.
“Caleb you’re in the wrong room!”

I followed him back through the halls
The music thundered through the walls
He knows my preference, always has.
And thus we found the room of jazz.

Screwerize it Jess! This poem is took long! We’re breaking it into sections. I’ll post the remainder when I get it finished! Happy Rhymetacular day! Bouncy bouncy bouncy…